Hunting Enlightenment

We were both up early, way before sunrise, or as my wife would say, too early for normal people. I gathered my gear together piling it up near the door, all the while being watched intently by my two-year old yellow lab.  I placed his morning meal into his dog bowl, but he wants no part of it, his excitement has his mind focused on other adventures. 

I hardly slept due to the anticipation of the first hunt of the duck season. Yet my dog, Chase, had no problem dropping into a deep sleep that night, not yet knowing my plans for the following morning. But once I cracked open the gun safe and pulled out the shotgun and started dressing in my camo clothes, the jig was up, Chase knew exactly what was in store and he was not going to let me out of his sight, food was the last thing on his mind. Finally I had all my gear in order and was ready to go hunting. Chase was laying down, with the front door in sight, but was as tight as a stretched out bungee cord. I waited until the last second to tell him to come, he then sprang up so fast that the throw rug that he was laying on ended up on the living room floor a few feet away. Chase was bouncing around and excited as a five-year old in a candy store. I asked him to sit, placed the e-collar on him, he now knew that we were serious and now in business.

I got the gear into the boat as Chase waited patiently on shore until he was asked to hop in. Chase loves boat rides, he props himself up on the middle seat with his front legs facing forward, the wind in his ears, watching the world go by in sight and in scent. He watches intently as the Coots scurry out of way of the craft, some flying, some diving to get out of our path. His excitement is contagious as a smile plays across my face,  to see this much pleasure from such a simple event such as a boat ride sometimes makes me envious of my dog who seems to find pleasure in the most mundane tasks that I take for granted.

We finally reach our destination, we offload the gear as Chase surveys the small island where the duck blind is buried. I set the decoys and place the boat in a hidden and distant location. He patiently sits and watches me on my trek back to him. He is happy to see me, as I settle into the pit blind, he then curls up next to me awaiting the sunrise together. It is too early to shoot, yet Chase watches the birds flutter by in the dim morning light, he seems happy and content as he stares into my eyes. A calmness settles over both of us, and a peaceful feeling that I fear many will never experience in their lifetime. When life is allowed to be simple, then happiness is simple to find. A man, his dog, and nature, a true trilogy of pleasure. If there are blessings to be had, then this may indeed be one of them.

Secrets My Dog Won’t Tell Me!

I'll wait, after all, your only human!

Now usually I do not advocate the watching of Oprah or any other daytime talk shows, as a matter of fact I spend more time deciding if jeans or shorts should be worn for the day. But since my shoulder surgery, I have had an abundance of time (Much to my wife’s dismay) and have sometimes left the tube on during the day as I go about thinking what I should do next. Today, the Oprah show caught my eye, it was an episode that Glenn Close was a co-host on, I guess due to her being a sponsor of sorts or something to that affect. The story was about the training of service dogs, to be used for returning military personnel who needed the help of the dogs on their day to day existence. The training was performed by inmates at a jail, I cannot remember which one, but that does not really matter.

What struck me was how these men, some were in for robbery, murder and other crimes against others or our society, responded to these animals. Now, I am sure that there are a few out there that would have no problem hurting or injuring a dog or any living thing no matter how cute or innocent, but these men were not that kind, at least not from what I saw. What impressed me was the transformation and the mark that a simple living creature left on these life hardened souls. They freely gave their love in exchange for the love that was shown to them, an unconditional love that only a dog can give.

How could they not accept the love from a dog? A dog looks at us and does not care if we are rich, poor, well dressed, good looking (Something I am glad my dog does not care about), took a shower or if you even watch Oprah or not. They trained with these dogs, the dogs stayed and slept in the cells with them, on a daily basis. They only got to keep the dogs for a year, at which point the dogs would be taken to finish their training and then placed with a soldier who needed the dogs special skills.

Many of the men were quite upset when the dogs were given up, some even cried, not what you would expect from a prisoner. One even got to see the dog he trained after it was placed with the soldier, quite a touching moment. To hear these men talking about their dogs later on and to see the emotions that were displayed really made me realize how much we take our own dogs for granted sometimes.

We always expect them to be there when we get home, to see how excited they get when we return. The times when your dog could be anywhere in the house, yet he chooses to lay next to you or right on your leg or foot instead, as if we ourselves have been chosen or are somehow special. Sometimes life gets in the way, and we may inadvertently postpone spending time with our furry companions. But no matter how rude we are to them, no matter how many times we forgot our promises to them of playing with them a little longer the next day, or just blowing them off altogether. They are always there for us, it’s like they forgive us, for just being a human.

They are our salvation, even an atheist would feel that they have gotten a celestial reprieve when a dog loves you simply because you and him are together. With that, my heart goes out to even those convicts, because no man or woman should feel the loss of a loved one, be it permanent through death or even for the greater good and the valuable service that was possible due to their sacrifice of love. The pain they felt was real, just as real as when I lost my dog of fourteen years. My hats off to those chosen men in prison that gave so much. Even though society may think that they are less then civilized or have no redeeming qualities, I say, maybe we should ask ourselves, what does the dog know that we do not? Or, are those secrets so precious, that only a dog is privileged to know, such as how to over look our human flaws. Quite an admirable quality if you ask me.

So the next time your rushing out of the home and the dog is watching you, knowing that playtime has been postponed once again, take that extra second to show them at least a little bit of love before you go, and follow through on your promise of that fun time that is so richly deserved. After all, they give us so much for what little we give them. The least we can do is love them as if there is no tomorrow, because one day, you will be right. Now let me go find my 75 pounds of yellow love and see what he is in the mood for. Now where did I put those treats?

 P.S. I found a link after I posted this blog that explains more about this wonderful program and also has a means for you to buy products where the $2.00 of each sale goes to the program, and also ways to donate. An informational video is also at this location or one of its tabs. Here’s the Link: http://www.fetchdog.com/pet-supplies/dogtoys/chewtoys/dogtags-chewy-shoe/T20011 Thanks for looking.

The dog says NO!

From puppy to senior, you mold your dog

I had brought my dog out to see some people that were on our property (County folks), one of them we already knew, and the other two were new faces being shown around.  After heeling my dog all the way to the people and him waiting until the command was given to go and greet them. Chase, our dog (My wife and mine, depends on who is holding the treats or doing more fun stuff) was interacting with the two ladies. Like most people they feel that they have to get the dog to sit, and possibly do other tricks. Chase is a hunting dog and has special cues and commands that are specialized for what I want him to do. Most people think that all dogs are trained the same, so they use what they feel is a universal command for their requests, but all they get is the tilted head from the dog. One of the ladies asked Chase to sit, and even before his butt hit the ground she was asking him to lay down, then shake, then speak, dance around and also do her laundry, all within the span of three seconds. Now to me this is what I find detrimental to training dogs and communicating with them. Everyone wants to be the nice guy or gal that all the animals will listen to, but this can set you and the dog up for failure. So if you do not mind, let me give you some of my rules that I try to follow when in the real world.

Now let me first say that I was also guilty of what I am going to pass onto you, and will also admit further that sometimes I still falter, yes its true, I am not perfect (I hope my wife does not see this admission to my lackluster image). So know that these words that follow, are from experience and not some brochure that was acquired at the local Pet-smart outlet.

When you come upon a dog, you should not pet it, if you want to pet the dog ask the owner. Sometimes a dog may be in training for just the thing you are about to do. This way the owner can tell you no, or direct you in how they would like you to proceed. Also when you meet a dog, you do not have to be the alpha and start having it sit, stay, roll over etc. Just pet the dog and enjoy it. If you do want to see how well trained (Or not) the dog is, ask the owner if they have special signals for the commands, you’ll know right away if your offer has been accepted. Most people like to show off their dogs and do not mind passing on the info. But there are those who would rather keep it a closely guarded secret, so just say thank you and walk on. Basically, give the dog and the owner room to be in their space and be gracious, it will go a long way.

Now back to your own dog and why they fail. I hate to say it, you can send me flaming emails, but the majority of dogs that have problems, by not behaving, being crazy, chewing and destroying your Mona Lisa painting and so on, can usually be directly connected to the owners (I can hear you cursing me).  Sorry, but its true, the owners allow the dogs to get away with murder, they do not set the rules, and if they do, they do not follow through.

So a little bit of information to hopefully get you on the right track:

1. Always when training, have control of your dog, such as a leash. If you cannot back up what you ask the dog to do, you are already losing the battle. Control is the key, there should be no way out, or any way to get away from you.

2. Have a plan in your mind before beginning. How will we teach the dog what we want from them? How will we reward the dog for the correct response? Know what you want first, it may only be sitting, or recalling the dog, but this way you can focus on one command, you can always add more things as you both progress. Also, you must be consistent in your commands, this is important if you want to communicate with your dog.

3. You are working towards 100% compliance 100% of the time. When you say sit, the dog has to sit before anything else occurs, same for other commands. Say you call the dog to come to you, it must come to you and be near you before you ask it to sit, then when the dog is fully seated as you want it to be, you can then reward the dog and move on to laying down or whatever you have planned. But most importantly, the dog needs to know that you are not asking, you are telling them what is expected. Dogs think in black and white, the more slack you give them, the slower the response or maybe an outright refusal.

4. Make it fun for you and the dog, especially puppies. For every 5 minutes of training there should be 10 minutes of playing. Even if you are short on time, put in a minute or two to at least get something in. You can also ask commands throughout the day, this way your dog knows that it is supposed to listen whenever you ask, not only during training sessions. Also remember that if you train a command in the house, move to the front lawn and do it there, then do it some other time in the backyard, at a friends house, a field. Dogs can get accustomed to an area, then when you go someplace else, it is a whole new world of smells and sights, and you need to teach them that they listen where ever you are, whenever you ask.

5. If the dog is not doing what is asked of it, try this flow chart, remeber to look to yourself first:

 a. Have I taught the dog what I am asking of it.

b. Did I give the command correctly.

c.Was the dog distracted.

d. Is this an outright refusal.

If you have went through the flow chart and are at d. then correction and compliance may be needed. Please write me if you have gotten to this point, it is a delicate matter and needs to be handled based on the type of dog you have. Corrections only need to be as strong as what will get the dog to comply. Sometimes just a stern voice, sometimes a little more. But what might work for one dog may not work for yours, so ask if you are not getting anywhere.

6. And the last one for now, if you should get frustrated, just ask the dog for something that you know they will do, and then after they do it, stop. Put the dog away or inside and just relax. Some dogs will take ten times to learn something, another may take fifty. Just be patient and consistent, and you and the dog will triumph.

This is an oversimplification of dog training, but this is better then nothing. There are many factor that go into getting you and your dog to understand each other. A dog that has an owner who pays attention to it, that puts the dogs mind to work, gives them tasks to do, takes command of the dogs life, will have a happy pet.  When you lead, the dog takes a back seat and will be less aggressive and a much happier dog, since you are the head honcho, they have nothing to worry about, right?

So in closing, yeah! I know there is so much more to cover, but at least with this info you can get going. If this does not answer your questions or you want to know more, drop me a line, I will be more then glad to give you special attention if you need it, or you can look up some other sites that can help you with a full plan to train your dog.

Good luck, take care

Steve

Don’t look now, but I think its Jesus!

Gives a whole new meaning to being a follower!

I know, I know, I am gonna get some emails vilifying me and also letting me know where my soul will spend eternity, but you gotta admit, you don’t see this everyday.

I just heard about this phenomena today and could not resist. I don’t know how long it’s been up on-line, but I did get a kick out of it. It seems that someone has a dog that when you look at its rear end,….. aw hell, I’m dammed anyways!……. it’s ass, there is a distinct image that many would agree looks a lot like Jesus Christ.

I have to agree that it definitely looks like the image we have seen of Jesus. But, I gotta say a whole lot of  other thoughts creep into my mind. Are we that desperate for any signs of religious confirmation that even this innocent dogs ass is up for grabs (Pun intended). Do you think this dog even realizes what he’s got working back there? I am sure this is bringing the nut jobs out of the woodwork. Is this guy making any money off of this? I sure hope so.

The image on this Terriers derriere is being claimed a miracle by some. Is this what might be considered a miracle by today’s standards? Whatever happened to the parting of the red sea, bushes talking as they are burning, great floods, talking serpents, wine out of water (One of my favorites to this day, gotta get that recipe) and so on.

Have we lowered the bar so low that even when a dogs ass (There I said it again) has an image that bears the semblance of a world famous religious icon that it causes such a flutter in the religious community. Imagine the uproar if the dog was not neutered and you had a pair of twins hanging on Jesus. Even worse, can you shake the image of the head and face of Jesus when this little pup crouches to take a dump. Or how about when he’s cleaning himself and Jesus takes a licking and keeps on ticking. What about if Jesus was getting dragged across the living room floor by this pup, or how guilty would you feel every time you told your dog to sit!

I wonder how easy it was to housebreak this dog, “Honey look, I can’t believe it. We just got this guy, he’s only 8 weeks old, and he is already potty trained. Wait a minute……, watch that last piece of poop drop out of his butt, do you see what I see? Oh my god!!! Its Jesus….., I mean an image of him. Do you see it too? Dear lord, it’s a miracle! Quick Patty, call the Enquirer, better yet, The Daily Post”.

Was it just a matter of time that we would see this, after all dog spelled backwards is god, coincidence, I think not. This gives a whole new meaning to being a follower of Jesus, at least twice a day when you take the pooch for its walk. It never ceases to amaze me how things like this have any bearing on our lives. There are those that feel the image has been altered through the use of Photo-shop or some other image editing software, and I tend to agree with that theory. But lets just say for arguments sake that the dogs ass (Heh, Heh) is real and there is this sacred image of JC himself. What does that have to do with the price of eggs in china, absolutely nothing. Just because some natural occurring object, food, or otherwise has some image that we can relate to and just so happens to look like the Virgin Mary, Jesus or even Elvis, and now maybe Michael Jackson (Too soon to mention him?) does not mean that the heavens or some other godly or supernatural entity is sending anyone a sign of good, bad or otherwise. It’s kind of silly and selfish to think that god has nothing better to do then to shape a potato chip into the Mother Mary breast feeding a baby Jesus or emblazon a piece of toast with an image of the last supper. Religious fanaticism and their constant attempts at validating their beliefs can take the normal to such extremes that it makes the rest of us wonder who is not taking their medications.

So if this is real, I then can only hope that I have saved the proverbial dogs ass and prevented some foolish Christian or Catholic acolyte from stealing this dog so that they can take it to where they feel it needs to go to its rightful place in some church in Newark New Jersey, or maybe even to the Vatican. Just so that people can look at the south end of a dog in order to bring them some type of rapture or revelation. Let me tell you, one poof of puppy gas with your face too close to the image of this Jesus would not only induce rapture, but might even cause your eyes to weep and your throat to close.

I do hope that this pup can move on and lead a normal canine life. In closing, I would like to say that the same holds true for sled dogs and religion, as the saying goes, if you’re not in the lead, the view never changes. So if you should see this dog in the streets, please refrain from wanting to touch the holy image of Jesus, we know wheres he’s been.

Arf, Arf, Your First Puppy, Part Deux

Traveling in style

So far we have covered several categories concerning the choosing of your new puppy.

How much should you spend?

Where do you live?

What do you want the dog for

How much time can you spend with the dog?

So you have asked yourself the above questions and even with the odds teetering on the negative and also against your better judgement, you have decided that a dog is for you and you are willing to put up with this juvenile fluff ball in order to be blessed with that canine companion that you dream about and think you need. Well, all I gotta say is YOUR CRAZY!!……Like the rest of us. I could not think of life without a dog, without a cat maybe (No offense to cat lovers, but you should not be reading this anyhow, go change the litter box), but not without a dog. Even after we lost our last dog of 14 years, it took us about a year and a half before we were ready for another one. If I did not have the dogs that I train and work with around me, I probably would have caved in sooner.

So lets move on (Wiping tears from my eyes), your ready for that big jump, let us not delay the inevitable.

Where do I buy the dog?- This is a loaded question,  you can search high and low and still have trouble finding the perfect place or person to buy your dog, but it is possible. Whatever you do, please do not be in a hurry to get a dog. I cannot stress how important it is that you get into this with a level head. If you can view some of the pups in their sixth week of life, it is great, but do not give up on some of those older pups either. I also really stress on seeing both parents if possible. Check out their temperaments and also their looks. I must also tell you that your gut feeling should also play a part in it.

WARNING! All puppies are cute and will tug at your heart strings, view several litters if possible. Do not feel bad if none of the pups strike your fancy, you are not obligated to buy any of them, pass them up. It is better to wait for the right dog then to half heartedly pick one and not be happy with your choice.

Breeders are of course a good choice. Ask a lot of questions, be well read about the breed of dog that you are interested in (Mutts and the mix-em up breeds are  a little harder to target, so be wary). There are some breeds that have hip problems, eye problems, mouth and nose problems, or are prone to other hereditary diseases or conditions. Make sure that the breeder has screened all breeding stock for heritable diseases, and to use only those dogs that have received the appropriate OFA and CERF clearances for hips, elbows and eyes in their breeding program.

Ask around about the breeder and do not be afraid to ask for references, they should be freely given, since they are usually proud of the dogs that they have created. This is usually not the cheapest way to buy a dog and you will most likely be paying a premium for the dog, but if you can afford it, then go for it. If you stray away from professional breeders, and happen across a person who happens to have a litter, it still may not be a bad way to go, and will also drop the price, but you should also check the parents if at all possible, so as always, buyer beware.

If having a papered dog does not matter for you, then this can open up a whole new venue for pups or even a slightly older one. Shelters, the newspaper, the local dog pound, all are great places to find dogs. But I must warn you you, if this is your first dog, then maybe you need to stick with dogs that are pups. It may not suit you to choose a dog that has been turned in to a shelter or was rejected for one reason or another. Sometimes these dogs need a well trained hand to bring them around, and an inexperienced owner would just make matters worse. The dog needs to fit your personality along with the other issues we already covered. More on that later when we get into actually training the dogs.

So, after looking at a few litters or pups, you find that there is this one dog that you feel is the one. Most sellers/breeders may require a deposit, this is common. Cover your keester and get receipts, and make sure that it is refundable if something should not work out or you find another dog that suits you better. Do not be afraid to ask questions and clear it up before you hand over your cash, and most importantly, have any promises put in writing and signed by both of you. Also, find out about vaccinations given and schedules, also are the dew-claws removed or not, if it is important to you (Dew claws are the claws that are further up the leg of the dog, sort of like a thumb. Usually they are removed within a few days after birth, otherwise they are left on. This can be a controversial subject. If you have any questions, contact a veterinarian for more info. My current dog still has his). Remember this is a business transaction, protect yourself. Once you are satisfied with the seller and the deal you struck, then it is just a matter of waiting for the dog. You really should not get the dog until it is at least eight weeks old, any younger and issues may develop, too much older and issues may develop….get the picture! If in doubt, older is better then too young in my opinion.

Well, that’s enough information for now. I will cover what occurs after you get the little fella/gal back to the casa. I would also like to cover what roll you play in this very important part of development for your future happy and well mannered companion.

Check back again for the next part in this series, or send me a message if you can’t wait and need the info sooner,  or if you just have some questions or need some tips. Thanks again to those who commented!

Arf, Arf, Your First Puppy

First night home, the spoiling begins.

Having been around and training dogs for years, one of the biggest  questions that I get is, how do I choose the right dog? Unlike having kids or your family, you get to choose your dog, at least you have that working in your favor. But many people pick a pup without really thinking it through. No doubt that all puppies are cute and will bring the toughest hombre to their knees and have them making funny noises and raise their voice at least an octave. We see the pups, and lose all common sense,and just gotta have them. This type of impulse decision making accounts for the majority of dogs that are given up and sent to the pooch pound, with a dreadful conclusion if they are not adopted in a fair amount of time.

I think people either don’t know what it is like to have a puppy, or if they had a dog before, have forgotten what it was like to have this fur ball of fun invading your private domain and taking over the premises. So, lets go over some basic considerations, so that you and your canine companion are as a perfect match as good karma will allow.

How much should you spend?- First figure out how much dough you want to lay out for a dog. Pure breeds and those with all the bells and whistles could cost you a few hundred bucks to even thousands. But if you do not really want a papered pooch, and are just looking for a furry writhing ball of love, then mutts or Heinz 57 dogs are sometimes as good if not better. But, even if you buy your dog at a shelter or a dog pound, there will be a price for the love of your dog, mostly it is to help pay for spaying/neutering and other veterinarian services, a bargain if you ask me. Sometimes you can get lucky and find a free dog, if that is the case, skip to the next line.

Where do you live?- One of the biggest mistakes is getting the dog you always wanted, without consideration or thought as to where you live. So, you always wanted an English Bull Mastiff, but you live in a 400 square foot single bedroom apartment, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO HAPPEN!! The dog is too damn big for the apartment, at worst you will be living scenes from Turner and Hooch, or at best you will have to sublet another space so that at least you both can get some sleep. Maybe you get a high energy working dog, leave him home all day without exercising the mutt, and come home to a shredded and chewed apartment or house and then blame the dog. PLEASE, think about where you live, how much space you have, do you have a backyard or not, how much time can you put into the dog for its training, exercising and just plain contact. Some dogs are better suited for apartment living and other dogs need room to run and may also need more attention. Talk to a vet, a local trainer or someone who is dog savvy, to help you narrow down your right choice of dog.

What do you want the dog for?- We all know you want the dog for fun and companionship, but do you have other things you want the dog for? Do you want a hunting dog, a security dog, a family dog and so on. Different breeds lean towards certain tasks and environments better then others. Dogs have been bred for years, or even centuries for a desired type of temperament, specific tasks or abilities that the dogs are known or built for, and even for certain cosmetic effects. Some are more friendly with everyone, while others are loyal to only one person. There are dogs that love all dogs, then there are those that will chomp on a Chihuahua just to see if they taste good. Be fair to you and your new addition, and like a tool, pick the right dog for the right job.

How much time can you spend with the dog?- No matter what dog you pick, unless it is an older dog, or one that has already been trained, you will need, no let me rephrase that, you will have to make time to teach your puppy what the rules and expectations are, and time is the key, lots of it. So if you cannot put forth the effort, which definitely pays off later on, then get a turtle or a cat, or maybe an ant farm. But I can honestly say, you only get out of your dog, what you put into it. (I’m not talking about the south end of the dog, more on that later).

That’s all for now, I’ll leave you with this. Check back later for the next part of this series, or send me a message if you cannot wait and need the info sooner, or if you need some training tips!

Home again, Home again Jigety Jig – OUCH!

Well it’s been awhile since I have had the time or the inclination of writing here again. A lot has happened, I have had shoulder surgery, am out of work, learned of the pleasures of prescription drugs, had an estranged daughter contact me and then ignore me, learned to wipe my ass with my left hand and then have gone through the phases of my recuperation, some good, some bad. The good thing is that my family is always there for me, I love them to death, including the grandson and the new granddaughter, who will be a year old shortly.

In May I went in for surgery to have my rotator cuff repaired and some bone spurs removed from my clavicle. Everything went smoothly, and as was advised, I opted for the nerve pain blocker. Well, all went well, and I started thinking to myself, this is not so bad.  I was operated on sometime after 8 AM and was discharged around 1PM. So I was at home not thinking too much about the surgery, until about 8 pm. The pain blocker was wearing off, I then took the doctors advice and self medicated myself.  All I can say is that I underestimated the pain to follow, I should have sucked down the whole bottle of Oxycontin. My pain, on a scale of one to ten, shot from a four to a thirteen!! All in a matter of a few short minutes from the first realization that good drugs should be appreciated, to the brain numbing pain that had my wife worrying,  and me writhing on my couch. We were both prepared to go to the emergency room, but I gritted my teeth, took more drugs, and rode it out. I did not get too much sleep that night, but the following day the pain had receded to a bearable level.

Recuperation has been moderate and I am already into my third visit with the physical therapist and have seen good indications of additional mobility, though they are still passive movements. I am almost able to drink a soda from my affected arm, and can happily say that I can now wipe my flat ass with my right hand again.

During this time I received an email from my daughter who lives with her mom in another country. We had good relations until I married my current wife, then things went downhill  from there, no fault of my current wife, since she is a truly sweet person who would not hurt a fly or say the meanest word. Things seemed good at first, her emails sounded positive, then they took a turn for the worse.  She started to belittle me and treat me worse then the proverbial red headed step child. Now she does not even have the courtesy to write back. I have bit my tongue and have tried to stay on the high road, but that has not been productive. I am not saying that I was the best dad, and I have even apologized for what had happened in the past, that cannot be changed. But many times I have asked her what she wants from our relationship, and have yet to hear a definitive answer. I feel that a relationship should go both ways, she never tried to contact me during our time of absence, but I am willing to put this behind me.  All I am asking for is a fair shake. If she does not want to have a relationship, she should then say so, then we can both continue with our lives. I will try again tonight and see what happens. Stay tuned.

Freedom Flight

 

Awaiting the next flight

PLEASE NOTE, THIS STORY IS ABOUT OR MAY ELUDE TO TRAINING HUNTING DOGS USING LIVE BIRDS, THAT MAY NOT SURVIVE THE TRAINING PROCESS. IF  YOU THINK THAT THIS MAY OFFEND YOU, EVEN IN THE LEAST, THEN PLEASE DO NOT READ.

 

 

I have a yellow lab who is being used as a hunting/retrieving dog. One of the phases of the training requires that live birds be used to judge the dogs enthusiasm and to get them used to flapping wings and moving body parts. So when he was about 8 months old, I figured that he was ready for the live birds. So down to the feed store to pick up some pigeons to train with. After picking out five birds, or flying rats as some would call them, I headed home with my newly acquired cooing friends in a plastic canine kennel.

After arriving home, Chase, our dog, could see and smell the birds and was very interested in them. So, I pulled out the first victim, a white bird with spotted colorings. I clipped the wings to limit his flight. I get the dog ready, have him sit just like he is supposed to and then with little fanfare release the bird into the air. Now typically the bird will rise for a few yards and then fall back to the earth, and then the dog is released to retrieve the bird. But my minds eye betrayed me as the bird flapped it wings and then turned and flew past me about 10 yards above me, I could have sworn that it gave me the finger with its middle wing feather as it gracefully flew past and into the nearby eucalyptus. Both me and my dog turned to look at each other, he with a whiplash smile that indicated pure pleasure in the past 8 seconds of comedic relief, and my look of  realization that I had not cut enough of the flight feathers.

So back to the box to select the next training tool for my dogs ongoing education. Another fine pigeon specimen was dragged from the cage, this time the flight feathers were clipped and scrutinized severely to ensure that the prior humorous scene would not be duplicated. So we head back out to the shooting line, this time with the bird well prepared. Chase is waiting patiently and the bird is released. This time he arcs, peaks and then gracefully cascades back to earth and into the pickle weed as was originally intended. Chase is filled with excitement but is holding as he has been taught, however, he is a spring waiting to be released. His anticipation fuels his instincts as the command to retrieve is given. Softly I speak “Chase”, his name barely a whisper, yet he explodes from his sitting position leaving tufts of grass and dirt in his wake. In a matter of seconds he comes to the bird, finds it, yet hesitates putting it into his mouth due to this wildly flapping and running bird. He chases the bird, stops when it stops and then repeats this several times. After some positive re-enforcement, he gently grips the bird in his mouth and brings it back to me. We do this several times, until we can see that the bird is worse for wear. The bird is humanely dispatched and used until it is apparent that it is time stop for the day.

So I have these three birds left in the kennel, and figured that there is another three days of training to be scheduled. However, I never anticipated nor foresaw what was about to come. Something that was left out of the equation, the wife. Let me tell you about Linda, never has there been a sweeter more gentle person placed on this earth. She is loving, kind, generous and has the motherly instinct of ten women. So, as Chase and I revelled in our recent blood games and shared that moment as only two good friends or hunting buddies could, in walks Linda towards the back of the pick up. She caught us off guard as she asked how the training went. I replied on how well and how proud I was of our furry boy and his epiphany as to what mother nature has hard wired him for, hunting! She congratulated us and then peered into the plastic kennel where the remaining three cooing convicts were being held to await their fate in the planned following days.

Linda took a step towards the kennel, she then looked deep into the plastic containment. Her face changed from that of an inquiring and curious young child, into a sad and forlorn expression that reminded me of Bugs Bunny when he would pull his ears back and his eyes would grow to the size of saucers, the only thing missing was the tears at the bottom of her eyes. “They’re so cute” she sighed. “Yeah, I guess they are” I said with a look of confusion on my face. Linda turned to the birds and then turned back to look at me with the pouted face of  a three year old who just dropped her ice cream on the hot asphalt of downtown main street. “Do you think we can let them go?” the only thing missing was a quivering lip.

Now let me say that I had just spent $4.00 per bird only hours earlier, and if you ask my wife, she’ll tell you what kind of a cheapskate (OK, cheap son of a bitch) that I am, so now you can understand why she was so unsure of whether she should even ask me. I looked at the birds, who had now gathered together, and had also stopped cooing, as they pressed themselves against the cage doors to add that little bit of drama to the whole scene, I still say they knew what was going on. Turning to look at Linda again, I thought what the hell, for twelve bucks, I can make her happy not to mention the three feathered misfits in the kennel. “Sure we can let them go!” a twelve dollar lump popped up into my throat “Do you want to release them?” I asked. “No! I don’t want to touch them!” I could see the magic of the moment was waning. So one by one I reached in and released the feathery buggers, I must say that Linda had a very pleasing smile on her face. The birds each took off and flew towards the trees, except for the last one who circled us twice, probably thinking where he should drop a gooey wet load of bird crap. He then thought better and took off into the north hills.

Linda then came over and gently kissed me and thanked me for letting the pigeons go. I just smiled and told her no problem, it was good see that this made her happy. Chase, however, I must say was not so happy, he tried to go after each bird as we let them go and looked in disdain as they disappeared into the scenery.

So there we sat, a man and his dog, on the tailgate of the truck bed, me consoling my canine companion and him with his exasperated sad look. Live and learn as they always say. With a final glance into those deep concerned eyes of my furry boy, I promised him that I would buy the birds when Linda was working and hide them in a safe unknown area. It seems he understood my words as he sighed and then dropped his head onto my lap and fell into a light sleep. We stayed there as the afternoon light turned into darkness, we then got up and walked towards the house, both knowing that our secret was safe with the other.